Tag Archives: what the hell

From Sick to Super

3 Jan

Yesterday ended up being a big old dud. When I woke up at 3am feeling terrible, I knew a bad day was ahead. Lo and behold, when my alarm went off at 6:20 so I could get ready for Tabata, the energy was not there. Tight chest, congestion, difficulty breathing… yeah, I was not about to give my first shot at HIIT in that condition. So I whined in bed for a while, convinced I’d go to yoga later. When it became apparent that the proverbial elephants were not about to stop jumping on my face every time I looked down, I conceded to the fact that this was to be a day of nothingness. Oh well, I needed the rest. New Year Goal #2 in action.

Today I felt quite a bit better, but not 100%. Thankful today was supposed to be a rest day anyway. I am much less reliant on a box of tissues now. Wonderful sign.

Last week, my laptop did something rather unpleasant. I was working on it, when the screen became all skewed and suddenly this rainbow prism-like shape spread across my screen from the upper left corner. What. Ungood. Royal Rainbow.

So I left my computer at work to be diagnosed and ohhh boy it’s weird not having my laptop. However, I became the most ultra-productive without it. In the end, I’m counting it as a big win. Not only did I pack my lunch for tomorrow, I also laid out my athletic clothes for the week and picked tomorrow’s outfit. And did a load of laundry. And cleaned my whole room. This hardly ever happens on a weeknight and I love it.

Here’s to tomorrow morning, when my chest will (hopefully) be totally clear. And to the glorious return of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report tonight. I’ve missed those wonderful gents in the morning.

They’re not jealous, they’re just confused

10 Dec

Some of you may have seen the commercials for the new Reebok EasyTone sneakers, which have something blah blah in the sole and “tone” your thighs and butt. One of the tag lines is:

88% of men are speechless
76% of women are jealous
0% will know the reason is on your feet

And 100% of the commercials focus solely on objectification to sell the product. They all zoom in closely on a woman’s body, and talk almost entirely about image (I always think that last video is a Victoria’s Secret ad). There’s even one that talks from the perspective of the woman’s boobs (I was going to put a warning here, but you know what you’re getting if you click that). Umm what? Yeah, 90% of the time her chest fills up the screen, and voiceovers show her boobs talking to one another, showing how jealous they are of her butt. “Did you see? Nobody is staring at us anymore.” “Aren’t we still hot?” “Clearly.” If you visited the link up there, you’ll see that the first thing the company says about the shoes is they’ll give you a “nice booty.” At least with Victoria’s Secret commercials, you already know the company is built off the selling point of goddess-like women in expensive lingerie.

I know that the only reason I work out is so my boobs will be jealous of my butt. And my butt will be jealous of my legs. And my legs will be jealous of my spine. And my spine will be jealous of my inner ear. And my inner… wait, I blacked out, what’s going on here?

Seriously though, these ads read more Maxim magazine than Shape magazine. I think they may have missed their target audience by a bit. Or who knows, maybe they only wanted to target the superficial. Excuse me, I have to go make my medulla oblongata jealous now.